Transubstantiation is a longer spelling of the word “fiction.”

Some people believe that the delicacies consumed during the communion ritual are not merely a symbolic representation of the body and blood of Jesus, but literally (and magically!) transform into his body parts upon ingestion.

Empirical evidence supports the fact that no change whatsoever takes place. Surprised? The shape, color, flavor, odor, texture, and constitution of the goodies never literally change to the body and blood of anything.

Also, Penn and Teller have turned water into wine, without divine intervention.

Theologians moved the goalpost to suggest that the words were spoken figuratively. After sifting through the Bible (John 6:35 and 6:53), it is clarified that eating his skin means coming to him, and sipping his juices means believing in him. After all, empirically testing transubstantiation means opinions would have to change if it turned out to be scientifically impossible (which it is).